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HELP US HOCKEY GODS!! Blueshirts Latest Stumble Screams for Action of a Drastic Nature

By Tony "Even More Angry, Then The Other Day" Grater
January 26, 2010

I am tired of this team. Really, really tired of it. Game in, game out…NOTHING changes. Just when you’re ready to write them off, they drag you back in. And then, just when you think they’re about to turn a corner, they torture you, tease you, and then rip your heart out.

I was fine with them pissing this season away a few months ago, really I was. When they started off the season 7-1, I wasn’t fooled, because they’ve done this to me before. And when they started coming back to reality, and began dropping games left and right, I wasn’t surprised. They have been a hodge-podge team for a few years now. So, the brutal late October through mid-December nose dive, came as no shock. After all, this is the Rangers. Why else do they exist, other then to display mediocrity and to frustrate a loyal, passionate fan base?

But here’s the thing about these Rangers, they never can just totally bottom out on you. No, they have to play with you. After a brutal 7-18 stretch, they'll have the audacity to, all-of-a-sudden, wake up and decide, “Hey, we have a thing called pride. Let’s start showing it.” And they do. They'll start playing better. They show heart, they show guts. They show you the talent that, as a National Hockey League team, they actually possess. And with the likes of Marian Gaborik, Henrik Lundqvist, Marc Staal, Michael Del Zotto, Vinny Prospal, Sean Avery, Ryan Callahan and Brandon Dubinsky, it’s no shock when they actually start playing better.

But they can never sustain it. Call it a lack of leadership, a lack of chemistry, a lack of passion, or that killer instinct, whatever. The bottom line is that this team, as presently constituted, is not a Stanley Cup Contender. They're barely a playoff team, and they are certainly not in the running for the # 1 over-all pick in the 2011 draft. No, they are the epitome of mediocrity and frustration, never good enough, never bad enough. And with an ownership that barely knows they exist, and a General Manager that can basically do everything short of murdering Jim Dolan’s wife and kids in his office, the time has come for extreme measures, and a revolt from the fans.

We have no choice anymore. This franchise is going nowhere. They are cluttered with incompetence, from the clueless owner, to the GM, to the scouting, to the freaking announcers. I mean, really. Is anyone else as tired as I am, of listening to Sam Rosen and Joe Micheletti, night after night, laugh it up during the games with Al Trautwig and his stupid jokes, their constant praising of the opposition, and their constant fanny kissing of in-studio guests? Does anyone else wish the radio feed wasn’t on a delay, so they could listen to Kenny Albert and Dave Maloney call the action? Come on Ranger fans, SPEAK YOUR MINDS!!!

It is time to purge this organization of everything associated with it, and start fresh. The players, the owner, the General Manager, the scouting team, the announcers...everything. Just throw it all into a huge pit, drop kerosene on it, light a match, and let the bonfire of all bonfires rid us all of this brutal, poor excuse for a franchise, that James Dolan has run into the ground for the last, who knows how many years? How long has he owned this team for anyway, since 1940?? Enough already, seriously.

And I’m not stopping at just the innards of the organization, either. No, I’m greedy...I want more. I want to ensure that when a new Rangers team rises from the ashes of this long, overdue exorcism, that they will have a fresh start, a new out look on life, and more comfortable living space. What am I talking about here? Well, it’s very simple. That wonderful palace in Mid-Town, on 33rd and 8th? With the spoked-ceiling, and the obstructed views? I’m done with it. I don’t want it there anymore.

Burn the Garden down.

I’m not kidding. I’m tired of this, really. The building has been there forever. It’s got awful sight lines. No matter what time of year you’re in there, it’s 1,000 degrees. The ice sucks, the escalators that only go UP...suck, and then I have to walk down urine smelling stairwells, filled with tons of drunk, pissed off Ranger fans, who all want to get out of there as bad as I do, cause the home team just blew a 3-1 lead to the freaking Panthers. Well, I've had it. I'm done.

Burn the Garden down.

Get rid of it.

World’s Most Famous Arena...Famous for WHAT, exactly??

I know, I know...where will they play? Who the frig cares? Put them in the Izod Center until you build a new building across the street by the old post office, for all I care. It was originally supposed to be their arena, anyway. It was the scene of one their greatest triumphs, and the attendance capacity (19,040) fits in perfectly with the modus operandi of this team.

Burn…the Garden…down.

Will any of this really happen? Probably not, I’m mostly spewing venom here. Letting out anger...trying desperately as a fan, to rally other Ranger fans to demand action. Demand change. Call radio stations, picket outside the Garden, cancel season ticket subscriptions, stop watching games, ANYTHING. Just stop sitting by idly, and continue the blind support of this team, year in, year out. Because there will never be a thing done about the way this organization is run, until WE make our voices heard!

Yeah, I’m calling for a fan revolt. It's strictly of a non-violent nature, but a revolt, nonetheless.

But I’m also calling for an organizational purge, from top to bottom, from owner to porter, and from brick to pee-stained brick. By none other, then the Hockey Gods themselves.

Get rid of that freaking building in the heart of the Big Apple, and from its very stinking and rotting core…

Burn…the Garden…down.


  1. I got the lighters so when do we start the burning :)!!!!.....Think of it this way they can't live forever oooooooor can they?

  2. If they burn it down, where will the elephants go in March?

  3. Peter D. McAlisterJanuary 26, 2010 at 7:23 PM


    Right on my brother. I write for bluejacketsmix.com and I feel your pain. Though the Rangers have a long an storied history it is just as painful for us here in Columbus. Lack of any grit or effort by players, coaches or ownership!

  4. Well, the Rangers don`t have a GM, they don`t have scouts who really know talented players, they don`t have a captain who CAPTAINS, they don`t have d-men who come to play, they don`t have an offense, unless dump and change lines is now an offensive play, we know that there`s no toughness, we probably couldn`t envision how bad their practices are, after 3 years the young players haven`t shown much improvement, other than Cally and Henrik, nobody else deserves to be called pro hockey players. And it should be evident that other than a stern expression, Torts hasn`t a clue either. But hey, I watch other teams play, so what do I know?